Let Yourself Fall

“First best is falling in love. Second best is being in love. Least best is falling out of love. But any of it is better than never having been in love.” ― Maya Angelou

We all are familiar with that "oh s***" feeling when we first realize that we are falling for someone. I use the phrase "oh s***" because well it is a little bit scary isn't it?! Someone single handedly put their grip around your heart and started to pull it toward theirs. Their voice starts to become the absolute center of your calmness, their hand in yours begins to seem like home, and when you kiss it feels like the world is slowing down. "Oh s***, another human being has this much affect on me," is how the internal conversation might go. With that, maybe your first reaction is fear. Which makes sense! Of course if you have ever been hurt before in a relationship or in life in general, you know what you are putting at stake. You are offering up your heart which is no joke or something to take lightly. Sometimes, I think that if I ever feel this feeling again I will bolt for the hills. However, at the end of the day, I know I am going to embrace it. Who the hell am I to let "fear" or the hurt of my past have any place in my future? Ummmm hell no because that's just life people! I am currently in a class about ethics and morals in which required me to do a ton of reading that immediately made me think of this segment of my blog. One of the authors in specific really stuck with me because he portrayed this idea of it being "irresponsible" for someone to CONSCIOUSLY allow the broken parts of yourself that others have caused to take over parts of your future. Before I read this writing I never would have used the word "irresponsible" but in a way it kind of is irresponsible. Why would you let someone who has hurt you hold you back from something fresh, new and exciting? This is your world, you should be the only one doing the steering. We should not be blaming others for our "irresponsible" actions because quite frankly, you are in charge of you. For example, I always hear people talk about how they have "trust issues" from an ex or something of that nature. Why would you let someone take over your whole entire essence of trust? If it is of YOUR moral code to be trusting and be in a trusting relationship then stick to it and find one that will serve you right. Trust is an amazing virtue and you should not let the fact that someone might have taken your trust for granted make you no longer want to trust. Don’t let someone take that away. This is just an example, all I am trying to say is stop letting the things that went wrong in your past relationships hold you back from new. You are now living in the present and the future people! When you have the mindset of, "I have been hurt so much in my past I could never be in a healthy relationship," you are giving someone else too much credit. Try to think like this, "I have been hurt in the past but there is no way in hell I am letting my past hold me back from my future because I know that what I deserve is out there somewhere." You are only going to end up with one person after all, the rest of it is just trial and error. In my eyes, the future is in your own hands and you can either let it flow freely or hold yourself back out of fear. Which one sounds better to you? What is the worst thing that can happen? You get hurt? Oh well! Getting hurt is a part of life. It is infamous for us to say things like, "I am never going to fall for anyone again because I can't handle the pain." I don't know about you but I believe love is all powerful and yes heartbreak hurts but when I look back at love at the end of my days I am not going to remember the hurt that sometimes came with love. I am going to remember the feeling of falling in love. I am going to remember the warmth and passion that was spilling out of every ounce of my being at the end of my days. That my friends, is something that we cannot run away from. Nothing should take away the value and admiration falling for someone entails.

Beginning to fall for someone is a feeling that your brain can try to avoid but your gut or your heart is usually screaming the truth. If I have learned anything in my nineteen years of life it is that our brains like to play tricks on us, but your gut or your "heart" do not deceive you. There is a reason your gut is telling you to go for it, you might not know it right away but that's the beauty of having a heart. We can just let it lead the way and watch the journey unfold. Trust me, I know I sound a little bit crazy when I say to "follow your heart" but hear me out. Regardless of your religious stance I know that we all have gut instincts and intuition. For me, I know that my gut is God. I talk to him and that is how he talks back. However, my brain is just me and a bunch of weird chemicals swirling around. My gut is where I am trying to teach myself to always turn because I promise you that the truth lies there. Your heart can speak to you in ways that your human body cannot. Our hearts are the strongest part of us because they are a bit more complex than anything our physical body has to offer. So, no I am not talking about the heart in your chest, I am talking about your heart that is in your core in which is the absolute root of your being. Listen to it because I promise that your heart will always show you the way.

It is definitely important to guard your heart and make sure you are giving it up to someone who is deserving of it. However, if you are sitting there holding yourself back because of this "fear" that you might feel you are genuinely doing yourself a disservice. Allow yourself to feel a little bit vulnerable because if you are keeping your guard up to protect yourself from hurt well quite frankly you are holding yourself back from growth. The person in front of you might hurt you one day or you might hurt them. Better yet, what if regardless of the hurt that MIGHT come later, you both fall in love and learn HUGE life lessons from each other? I can personally say every person I have "fallen" for has taught me something and I have always come out a little bit stronger. Like I said, getting hurt is a part of life and we can't sit here fearing it. This might sound crazy but think about the times in which you were hurt by any aspect of life. There is NO way on God's green earth that you didn't come out stronger or learn something new about yourself. With that, yes, there are things to lose but there is so much gain! Fear should have no place in your life. Scratch that. Fear of LOVE should have no place in your life! Take the risk of letting yourself fall because you have no idea what is sitting right in front of you if you don't take that leap of faith. Allowing yourself to fall is like allowing your soul to experience the greatest nourishment possible. To find someone in which has inflicted such a strong spark within you is not something that happens everyday. It is like the beginning of a story when you first fall for someone. You have no idea what is going to be written on the pages but it is exciting that for once in our lives we do not have to know. We can just take the risk and see where life takes us. The good and the bad. Like I said, our brains like to play tricks on us, but when it comes to love your heart is where you should look. There is not enough time in our life time to pass up love or run away from it. Life is just too short. You have to let yourself love! Love is truly the thing that fuels us and allows us to thrive in our very own essence. Take it and run with it.